yellow Aussie tears

Posted: July 11, 2012 in This is the Voice of Lefty Reason

Yellow Jerseys, tears and humbled Aussies.  The “great summer of sport” really got cracking last weekend as Bradley “Wiggo” Wiggins grabbed the lead in the Tour De France, the Charmless Jock got all teary at Wimbers and England’s cricketers made the Aussies look second rate.  Wiggins looks like he could have been the fourth member of The Jam; I would lay a substantial wager that he has a paisley silk scarf in his wardrobe and loves a Northern Soul all-nighter.  Fit as a butcher’s dog, looked after by TeamSkys “domestiques” he is the antithesis of the three-lion faceless soccer morons whose charming Captain is currently undergoing a trial for racism.  I can imagine Wiggo belting out “one love” as he strolls in his boating blazer and two-tone shirt rather than the usual snarling and posturing of the modern sports icon.  The CJ missed out as Tarantino wore him down at Wimbledon; the CJ started well but the wait goes on (for him to smile) as he welled up in defeat.  The nation remains split over Muzzer; plucky Brit or Chippy Jock?  A conundrum for modern times.  The leather on willow chaps smashed the Aussies again on Saturday.  We suddenly look unbeatable and they look like a team of young tykes with the odd ageing bowling-beast thrown in for old time’s sake.  Can Wiggo hang on to Yellow?  Will the Aussies dredge up a Shane “bowlin’ Shane” Warne?  And will the CJ ever look as though he might, just possibly, be enjoying himself for batting a ball about?

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