you silly cult

Posted: July 12, 2012 in This is the Voice of Lefty Reason

Stack-heeled lunatic small-man Tom Cruise announced the next instalment in his marital career last week with the ending of his marriage to Katie Holmes.  The “crazy little guy” is morphing into a younger Tone Blair, with a smile almost as wide as the former PM.  Tom is, of course, the most famous devotee of the Church of Scientology; the thoroughly bonkers “religion” that seems to have been dreamt up by a pissed sci-fi writer who was high on mescaline at the time.   The “church” believes in alien invasion, thetans, electronic “auditing” and, most importantly perhaps, the donation of huge sums of cash.  Cruise is rumoured to have reached a higher level in Scientology circles and may be joining its “military” wing.  It all makes David “from sports presenting to idiocy” Icke appear a bastion of common sense and reality.  The Icke-ster famously went from Coventry City reserve goalkeeper to soothsayer and doom-bringer extraordinaire in a few short years; his Royal Family / Giant Lizard “exclusive” being a particular favourite.  Kate and Tom’s daughter Suri is at the centre of the split with Tom dragging her towards cult-dom and Katie wanting a more normal childhood experience for the six year old.  Huge settlement sums will be involved and the couple will no doubt describe it all as “amicable” as they hunt like particularly famished vultures for another celeb partner; utter madness. Now then, where did I put that Kabbalah wristband?

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